The communion song at church today was "Amazing Grace." One of my FAVORITE songs. I seriously get tears in my eyes EVERY SINGLE time I hear it. This verse gave me some needed energy:
The Lord hath promised good to me,
His word my hope secures;
He will my shield and portion be
As long as life endures
God promises to bring good out of all the hard areas. Two weeks ago, I woke up on a Monday morning and could barely walk. (No exaggeration) I have never felt so helpless. I was sitting at my chiropractors office @ 7am. (My back had been hurting for 4 weeks but I had been going to the chiropractor and she was adjusting me which gave so much relief.... it was better and the pain had slowly gone away.) She was a bit concerned so she sent me to another doctor for a shot, muscle relaxers and pain meds. We drove home and I literally laid down all day on a heat pad, popping pain meds & muscle relaxers every 6 hours. I was miserable. I have never had so much physical pain in my life.
Tuesday morning I woke up and the condition had worsened. Nic drove me back to the doctor. 2 hours and an MRI later, I was sitting with an orthopedic neauro spine doctor hearing "you have a herniated disc (L5, S1) & 2 degenerative discs. What?! How? How can HE allow this to happen to me? I have had 2 suregeries already this year and I just want my body to feel normal again. I couldn't even think straight. Nic and i just stared at each other. We didn't even know what questions to ask.
Do i have to have surgery? He said that first we would try a steroid dose pack, stronger muscle relaxers and stronger pain meds. I was on "bed rest" basically for 4 days. After lots and lots of prayer, I woke up a new woman on Saturday.
Monday morning I was back at work. I was so excited to be back in a routine!! However, after lunch (2:30 or so), I started feeling sick. I called a good friend/coworker to my office , she brought me a fan, ice packs and called Nic to come get me. I was getting hot quicker than i could shed my clothes. Food poisoning took me out for 2 days.
I remember laying on the bathroom floor (literally begging for Nic to call 911) and asking God "Why? Why? Why?"
The scariest part (Other than literally getting so hot so quickly I thought I was going to pass out) was the doctor had told me that coughing, sneezing and laughing can literally cause someone to throw a disc (similar to what I was dealing with) and here I am throwing up and dry heaving. I was terrified but I am here today. Another trial that I walked out of.
Lord if this must be necessary then continue to give me eyes to see as I walk.
A beautiful reminder of his faithfulness (this was our backyard last week, no filter used... isn't it amazing?)
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